Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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