her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
