i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
