I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
