My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
