It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
