If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
