You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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