Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
