Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize