I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
