Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Randomize