dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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