Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
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