We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
