i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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