He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
