I wannas sexs uuuuu
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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