I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize