I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
