I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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