I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
