I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Randomize
