jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
