were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
