i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She's the barista slut.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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