Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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