i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Vodka?
Forever.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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