White coat. Heels.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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