I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Randomize
