Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
