Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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