RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
