And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
