Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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