try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
