I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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