Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
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