I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
