The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
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