How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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