At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize