you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
