Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
