I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Congratulations! We have a period
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
