OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
