You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
