dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
