You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
