This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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